Relationships

Although I’ve received numerous e-mails from women seeking counsel since my book came out, this is the first sister “brave” enough to blog! I’m “So Thankful” for “Now Thankful!” It’s not easy writing about our mistakes and failures. But God gets great glory when our hearts turn toward Him, and we seek Him for answers. I continue to pray for this dear sister, and would love to get an update on the cold-war melt-down. Hurray for our side!I still marvel over the dramatic change that’s taking place in our marriage and in our home. Paul and I are in love! It’s pretty pathetic, really, we don’t like to be apart. Guess we’re making up for lost time! (I’m not complaining.) I even ride with Paul in the car to work, just to spend extra time with him, and then I drive home alone. It gives us extra time together in the morning, about 20 minutes, and we read MacArthur’s Daily Bible together (with study notes), marveling over what we’re reading! I love what biblical counseling expert Jay Adams writes in his book, “Solving Marriage Problems.” He says that marriage is a “covenant companionship,” a relationship where there is a constant commitment and intimacy. “Husbands and wives should be closest of all friends. Above all other relationships, marriage requires a willingness to self-disclosure.”Paul is willing to share his heart with me now, because he now trusts me. He no longer fears my judgments or lack of respect. He knows my desire is to promote and help him, in every way I can. God miraculously put this in me---I was never able to muster it up on my own.Looking back now, I think one of the critical mistakes I made was being too “intimate” with girlfriends; making some of them my “best friend,” instead of Paul. I often spoke against Paul, even to people who were not part of our solution (like a counselor or godly mentor). It was wrong, and sinful, and I believe it made matters worse. My mouth was reflecting what was in my heart; my heart was primed by unbiblical thinking---wrong beliefs and wrong conclusions. We didn’t stand a chance apart from God! If you are in the habit of talking against your husband, you can change. I have! Spend time thanking God for His provision of your husband, knowing that in His sovereignty He has given you just the man needed to work out His great purposes in your life. You can trust Him!